Stop: Promise or Try?

Hey ya,

I recently encountered a situation whereby 2 person (be it a couple or just friends) talk to each other about promises. When one of them did something wrong and never wanted to repeat itself again, he'll say "I promise I'll stop" but if he actually liked doing that wrong deed, he'll say "I'll try and stop from doing it".

These 2 responses are totally different to one another. They represent 2 significant differences is the magnitude of the effort. "I'll stop" would mean a person would do whatever it takes to stop from the wrongdoing while the latter would just means that he would try, to a certain extent, to stop it but not completely. Should he fail to do so, the sense of guilt will be lessen by just saying "Hey, at least I tried"...

So which one is your stand when u start doing something that is against the universe i.e God, religion, nation, etc? Is it going to be promise to stop and be given full pardon? Or is it going to be the "at least I tried" answer and still committing crimes and sins towards nations, religions and God Himself? The choice is up to you....cos my fate rides upon it

Smile

A little reminder to myself:

Smile, though your heart is aching,

Smile, even though it's breaking,

When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by,

If you smile through your fear and sorrow,

Smile and maybe tomorrow,

You'll see the sun come shining through you.

Light up your face with gladness,

Hide every trace of sadness,

Although a tear may be ever so near,

Smile, what's the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile,

If you just smile.

No One Wants To Be Defeated

The Unwritten Letter

This heart of mine is made of steel. Strong enough to face any problem that comes in my way but steel is just a steel. It has its limits. Even for steel. The steel is just a mere protector of what is inside. Once it starts to break, it's like an egg. Once you pierce the shell, it'll leak till there is nothing inside. This is what I am going through. I have been troubled with troubles over the last 5 years. Only a handful of people, like my family, that know what it is all about. That is why I have not been able to perform at the level that I should be doing. And so, I would like say the following things.

To Abah:

I am sorry that I still can't live up to the expectation that you have planted in me, and I will not stop until I reach your level of success and go one step further. I believe that is what I should aim at and I will strive to make you proud of me.

To Mak:

I am sorry for being an ungrateful son to you. I am sorry for not listening when I should have. Do forgive me as this young blood has a rebellious side unknown to others. You are my source of inspiration and you have showed me, time and time again how strong you are. I will do my best just to be half as strong as you and so that you can smile whenever my name is being spoken.

To Along, Angah and Ayoy:

I am sorry for not being able to fulfil my duty as a brother. While I should stay at home and play with Afiq and Adib, I chose to have a good time instead outside with my friends. I should have been a better brother to you and a better uncle to the twins. I am regretting my decision to go back early and the times I have not spent with the kids. I vow to be a better person so you can proudly call me your brother.

'Boob' Quest -Chapter 4

Confessions of A Forsaken Soul

There is not a single day goes by,

Without me looking up into the sky,

Raising my hands and voice to heaven,

Asking God why am I being forsaken.

Offering my blood as a sacrifice,

Of which I don't know whether it will be suffice,

What should I do, What should I do,

For my heart wants to be closer to You.

A friend once told me,

"You really have come far",

But the question burning inside of me,

says, "How far is far?"

Leaving On A Jet Plane

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn
The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I'll tell you now, they don't mean a thing

Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back I'll wear your wedding ring

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me kiss you
And close your eyes and I'll be on my way

Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
About the times that I won't have to say ...

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

And I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

Beaten And Scarred

Is there something wrong with me?
What is it that makes me so inferior to you?
What is it that I'm lacking?
The things that I need to impress you.

You are my heart,
You are my soul,
I've taken my stride,
Out of my very own shell for you.

I've been beaten and scarred,
Just so that I can earn a little bit of respect,
But no matter how hard I tried,
It is always not what you had expected.

I love you,
But what can I do?
Because I know there is no room,
For me to be there for you.

So tell me what to do,
What would I get,
Before I go alone,
And may never return again.

A little snippet

It's been ages since I last updated anything here. Been busy with some shit that kept me burning midnight oil and make coffee producers worldwide happy because of the amount that I indulged over that period of time. But it's now all over and I leave everything in the hands of God. Basically that was what I have been doing over the last fortnight or so. So there has been nothing that is out of this world, well, except a few of the 14days dealing with this shit was spent at Zureen's house. I think that is the only plus point during those days where my brain was put through the coconut grinding machine.

Apart from that, there is nothing much to say, really. Oh, to Lloyd Taylor Simpson, fuck you. Stupid customer service coupled with an already-full e-mail inbox and kept telling me to keep sending those e-mails that would never arrive even until Judgment Day. Just you wait, I will return with my battalion of brethren and spam you office till I get what I should have get ages ago.